Ollie's New Smelly Team
by GrowOldAndDieInNeverland
Summary: Katie drills her captain on why he's joining a professional team the smells bad. At Hogwarts he already has the best team anyone could ask for, and they even smell good. KBxOW


**So I have no idea where this came from it just popped into my head tonight. I'm not sure if its been done before. I haven't read anything with this idea, but maybe someone else has done it. Anyways, I currently have really bad writers block for Every King Needs a Queen, so I thought I'd post this and see what you all think. I've never tried writing Katie and Oliver before and I'm not sure how I did. So, enjoy...maybe.**

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"Hi Ollie!"

"I told you not to call me that," the Scottish Quidditch fanatic glanced up from the plays he was writing. His blonde chaser sat in front of him on the end table and cocked her head to the side staring at him intently. Neither said anything for a few minutes, but her gaze didn't waver. "Can I help you?"

"It took you long enough to ask." The girl plopped down next to him on the couch then swung her legs over the back so she was upside-down. "You should of seen me coming over and asked, 'Katie Bell, the most amazingly talented Chaser ever, what can I do for you?'" Shaking her pigtails, so they fanned over the seat she looked at him expectantly.

"Are you going to tell me?"

"Are you going to ask?"

"Fine, Katie Bell, blonde Chaser for Gryffindor with the shortest attention-span known to wizard, _what do you need?_"

"What makes you think I need anything?" She grinned innocently.

_"Katie…"_

_"Ollie..."_

_"Don't call me that!" _The girl's captain glared at her, then sighed, "Just tell me already."

"If I must-"

"You must."

"Hey! Don't interrupt me. You're the one who wants to know." The fourth year attempted glaring as her Captain did moments prior, but the affect was lost while the girl was still on her head. She waited a before continuing to make sure the seventh year would let her finish this time, then continued, "It has come to my attention that you and your _insane_ dawn practices are leaving us in a few months."

"Katie, I'm graduating this year. We've been through this before." he looked at her exasperatedly.

"I _know_, but that is not what I wish to speak to you about." The pretty fifteen year old waited to be pressed on the subject and looked disappointed that she would have to continue without prompting. "You are going on to be a reserve for a professional Quidditch team, correct?"

"Puddlemere United," the dark haired boy stated proudly. "You already knew that too."

"I see…"

"Where are you going with this?"

"Oh, nowhere in particular. _Puddlemere United_," she muttered to herself. "That's what I thought…"

_"What…?"_

"Just to be sure, Harry's still the best bloody Seeker ever, right? And Gred and Forge are the most wonderful beaters?" The Scottish teenager noticed that her hair was falling out of the pigtails as she shot her head back up and looked him dead in the eye. "Alicia and Angelina are the second best Chasers you'll ever meet and-"

"Katie, calm down. You're all brilliant, but I'm going to play on a professional team and-"

"_I wasn't finished!_ I am by far the most awesome, tremendous, astounding Chaser in the history of the universe, right?" She challenged, their faces inches away from each other.

"Yes, fine, I will never ever have a more incredible and talented team then you guys. And girls." He added at the younger girl's piercing look.

_"I see…"_

_"Will you stop saying that?"_

"Relax, Oliver. All I mean is that I find it funny that you're leaving _us_ for a smelly Quidditch team."

"Hate to break it to you Katie, but you don't smell the best after a game either."

"Maybe not, but at least we don't go around telling everyone how smelly we are," she replied shrugging her shoulders. "They all must stink _really_ bad…"

"What are you going on about?" The naturally tan boy had been a Puddlemere fan since he first saw a match when he was five. He never remembered the stench of the team ever being brought up in an interview or anywhere.

"Even the t-shirts advertise for the horrid scent…" She sighed thoughtfully, "Maybe that's a good thing. It's a nice warning if you were thinking about joining the team. Of course you were thick enough to ignore it."

_"Ignore what?"_ He stared at her incredulously.

"How bad Puddlemere must smell. You really are thick aren't you?"

"You're making no sense, Bell."

"Of course you don't understand, _Wood_. We've already established how dense you are."

_"How am I dense???"_

"Oh poor Oliver, you've forgotten already? I suppose it was to be expected from someone as dim as you." The blonde girl stood up and circled around the Quidditch fan reminding him of an animal stalking its prey. "I guess I should remind you. You're new Quidditch team," she smiled and nodded her head reassuringly as if speaking to a toddler, "is going to be very stinky," the girl then waved her hand in front of her nose to demonstrate.

_"STOP SAYING THAT!"_ Katie smirked in success as his temper rose.

"If you insist, but I must warn you that our dear friends Gred and Forge have decided to help you adjust to the prospect of having a less then sweet smelling team."

_"Huh?"_

"Yes, you see once I pointed out to them how Puddlemere United doesn't keep their stench a secret, they concluded that they must smell extra revolting. It was decided that you would fit right in-"

_"Excuse me?"_

Katie continued as if he hadn't said anything, "You're probably used to your own smell, however you might not be accustomed to being around other people with disgusting odors. After all, the rest of us have a wonderful non-repulsive scent, especially me."

"Katie…"

"It has been decided that in order to prepare you for Puddlemere, the incredible Weasley twins are only going to shower once every two weeks."

His face blanched at this, "Do you realize the hell we'll have to go through? They smell bad enough without showering in one day!"

"We are fully aware of the torture our noses will be going through, but are willing to make the sacrifice. We really care about you Ollie and want you to be fully prepared and ready when you join smelly Puddlemere United." The blonde Chaser smiled sweetly at her captain's look of horror.

"Think of how much we'll be seeing of them! Everyday at practice, at every meal, I'm surprised they're not here in the common room right now! Oh! At dawn practice, I doubt our nostrils could take that in the morning."

"The idea is to be around them a lot, Ollie. How else will you get used to it? Look at it this way: without their morning showers, they might start being on time for your dawn practices. I guess if you really don't want to smell them in the morning, stop scheduling practice then…" She glanced slyly at the Keeper out of the corner of her eye.

"Hold up, Bell. I know where you're going with this. You're making up a bunch of nonsense about Puddlemere smelling bad to try and trick me into not having dawn practices. Well, guess what? Your plan isn't going to work! I'll see you tomorrow, bright and early."

"Okay then, don't believe me. You're new team might not be smelly, but it sure seems like it." Katie started walking away.

"What do you mean?"

"Do you really want me to explain it? Look at your sweatshirt. What does it say?"

"P.U. You know, for Puddlemere United."

"Exactly. _PU._" She smirked and pinched her nose between her fingers for emphasis. "Right now, you're basically telling everybody else you smell too."

"_PU?_" He stared at his star Chaser as if she were crazy for a moment then faced palmed as realization dawned on him. "You have got to be kidding me."

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**How was it? Please review! I want to know how I did with this. Oh and one question: I want to start an online blog or journal or something like that. Any suggestions on what server to use? I'm not sure where to start and wanna know what different options I have....**

**Oh yeah, if anyone has a better title for the story please mention it. I don't really like the one I have now.**


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